The most amazing opening presented itself to me today– as I congregated me, myself and I for day 2 of the 9 day Hear-it  event. All happening in my own head, by the way. A real circus right?

The message that came very clearly today was to be in a state of YES. Not like saying yes to everything in an out of balance way, but a Soulful Yes. And through this Yes, Heaven on earth is possible.

I was guided to pick up this book about Amma (the Hindu saint). I revere this woman, but I don’t really jive with the worship of her, or worship of anyone else for that matter. But I will say that the first time I saw her I could recognize that she was a woman dedicated to the service of humanity, a Mother Theresa type. Anyhow, the book said that Amma shows up to be whatever people need her to be. When people are suffering, she shows up as Divine Mother, or when people are ready to be a disciple, she shows up as a Teacher. She does not define herself as ONE thing.

And so too can I follow this example. To be what is needed for me to be in the moment- with my intention to be of service, I show up in the form that the person in the room or on the phone needs me to be. I’m not talking about having no backbone or being controlled by what others dictate, it is more about letting go of all those ideas we have of what we need to be, and just be present. I find that it takes a lot of Wisdom to not attach to a persona we play, but to be in the empty space of being truly present.

And in saying YES, I also open up to the possibility that the Universe says Yes to me.

So, what do I want? What do you want? Can you say YES to your soul?

Maybe it’s true that when you look for red cars all you notice is red cars. Well, I’m in a red car, only this car feels like a freight train going through what seems like precarious rails built lifetimes ago. I remember wondering how with the chaos of India trains would run so efficiently. Of course seeing the big hole which was supposed to be the “toilet” in the filthy bathrooms of our moving Experience-the-culture-of-the-real-India was a bit daunting.

And then you’d see the hundred’s of people we would pass who were repairing, hiding from the sun for breaks, or just plain watching the NRI (Non Resident Indian) with her blue eyed kids as if they were mesmerized by the possibility of such an occurrence. And you knew by seeing them, and they seeing you, that it was a safe ride. Even if a bucket of Purell could not cure all the germies on the train, we were safe.

I have to remember the chaos of India this week. Yes, I had a birthday. Almost 40. I love getting older, but there was something funky about this birthday. Not what I did, but how I felt. Unsettled. And honestly, it’s not like me. The week before I was boasting on facebook about how grateful I was for my life. And I meant it. But something happened on July 11.

Don’t know if it was the solar eclipse, the new moon, who knows, but I silently fell into an abyss of miscommunications, landscapers cheating us of money and most sadly, feeling like I’m loosing a few friends. (It’s time, but who deals well with break ups anyway)  All the while I borrowed a book, named “Anger” by Tiht Nan Han. Great. Ok, so as I live this roller coaster, I remember our trip to India.

Oh, India is incredible. So incredible, but NOTHING could prepare me to the shock of Mumbai, and how my little one would react to it, or how my fears would creep in the middle of the night, as I watched people taking their 4am strolls through Juhu Beach, while watching my seemingly dying husband (he had dengue- mosquito infected due to his travels in the slums- joy).

I got through it. We all get through it, right? We breath. We feel the feelings. Think supportive thoughts. Seek good friends. Cry. Hope for the best. Know that it is temporary. And we get through it. Some with grace and some in shitty ways. (Like me tonight yelling at my husband). Oh well. That damn book taught me nothing.

The truth is that it is uncomfortable to feel this way. And I have to be honest, it’s been a long time since I have felt this way.

And what I am keeping close to my heart this from a newsletter called Currents of Change–

this powerful new Moon time is a call to come into right relationship.  This means initially that we need to be in right relationship with ourselves — to integrate the light and dark, the mortal and immortal aspects of ourselves.  Then, this lunar cycle is a portal for healing in our closest relationships.  It is a time for healing old emotional wounds regarding relationships and a time to enter into more whole relationships in which the fullness of each person is honored, allowing a deep mutuality and respect.

Whether you believe in astrology or not, it does not matter. What this is saying is that it is a time to look within and open to being loved by ourselves and beyond. And in doing so, all relationships are healed.

I hope this has helped. I’ve been hearing that many are having a challenging time right now. We are in this together. Let’s Open to the Divine. Right now.

Blessings,

Asha

She came into my life and was in pain. Physical, emotional, and whatever other kind of pain we can experience. We were in a group and you know what they say, Squeaky Wheel. Yes, when you are in pain, you gotta be loud. Really loud.

I saw myself in her, yet there was more and I wasn’t sure what it was. The group asked of her to be in silence, and that her answers would come in that place of true listening. She wasn’t ready to hear that,  and so she left. Never returned. I went deeper to really hear the message she was delivering in her short visit.

I got the visual to better understand the young woman I speak about through one of my husband’s photos. He brought this sad, sad story home for me to be profoundly changed by. These young girls live in the dump in Guatemala. Live. That is their backyard. That is their job. That is their grocery store. That is their Target, BJ and otherwise. This is home and everything in between.

Garbage day is everyday by Glen Cooper, www.visualreportage.com

Check the story: http://dmpj.com/blog/2009/04/garbage-day-is-every-day/

My dialogue with Mother Spirit about all this:

Mother: Asha, do you believe people live like this?

Me: Of course not! It is inhumane.

Mother: What do you think they feel, see  and want when you come into their home?

Me: They want desperately to be taken out of their pain, and they will say or do anything that gets them closer to eradicating the pain.

Mother: Is this person ready to be in silence?

Me: I suppose it must be really painful to try that one. Now I understand why it was natural for her to be offended (referring to the girl in pain). Asking her to be in the quiet of her pain sounds down right terrifying, and bordering on cruelty.

Mother: Can you feel compassion?

Me: I understand.

Mother: She wanted ways out of her pain- so she asked questions.  She was not prepared to work for it because that felt like more pain- so she would talk over you, and her own words. She is attached to the stories that brought the pain-so the pain now has a hold of her.

Like a child, she doesn’t know how to get out. Can you give her smaller bites? Can you show her step by step? Many do. Many try. Many fail. Some can hear the big answer and their hearts open instantaneously, some it takes years or lifetimes.

She is not your responsibility. She was here to teach. What a great Teacher she is. She taught the obvious of the mirror exercise, and she teaches the esoteric Truths that go beyond her, you, and your circle. Thank her for her Teaching. Release her from your responsibility. And embrace the next girl in pain, with an open heart.

You will know what to do. Listen.